It’s your boy once again. I thought we should talk. Ever since we fought, I’ve been going through hell. Nothing has gone too well. I fill my lungs with smokes, and my belly with hard liquor. My heart is full of hatred, covetousness, and anger, and my brain occupied by thoughts I can barely describe. For instance, whenever I walk down the street and I see a beautiful lady, I only think of how she’d be when she’s without clothes. But when I see half-naked celebrities on TV, I censure them, rain insults at them, and wish evil befall them. At the same time, I wish blessings upon myself and the entire circle around me: family, friends among others, even those who dress just like those people I see on TV. LORD, I’ve been such a hypocrite. Forgive me.
As I write this letter, it’s Sunday but I didn’t go to church. The last time I went to church, I had a nice time. I enjoyed how people danced around, shaking their bum-bums, the youth exhibiting their exuberance, similar to the way people danced when I visited the night club last Saturday. But this time, it’s not at the night club, so it’s fine. And I also witnessed the appeal for funds that went on.
I wish I could describe how I enjoyed it as much as how I didn’t enjoy it. For those who were able to give very large amounts of money, I believe they enjoyed it. Special prayers were said for them, and those who couldn’t give anything were encouraged to do so the next time. But the encouragement was indirectly telling them that it’s very wrong to not give something when you attend church.
The same way that the ‘preacher’ in a public transport would expect you to pay him for telling you to repent from your evil ways. They even expect the ‘trotro mate’ not to charge them for boarding their vehicle. When I want to take something from another person, I would firstly talk about an unrelated issue which would stir the person’s moral feelings. Then being aware of the state of their moral feelings, I would then ask them to give what I really want to ask. Lord guide and guard your children from guilefulness.
Many people pretend to be the lights, but their hearts are filled with darkness. When my heart was filled with darkness, it was your seven stars that shone upon my paths. When I thought I had lost my soul, your word held it, and I found it again. But when I tell the world, they don’t believe it because I do not go to church. Or I do not update my social media pages with words that praise you, words that thank You for saving my life.
But I know YOU know how grateful I’ve been for all the blessings you bestowed upon me, especially throughout the year 2017.
2017 was an amazing year. It started with committing myself to paths I never knew where they’d lead me, but that’s when you told me to have faith. When the road got rough, and everything fell apart, you put my pieces together and made me whole again. In 2018, I don’t wish for a better year, I wish for a year as good as all the other years I’ve lived on this earth. I pray that your wishes come through in the rest of the years of my life.
I will write again.